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- Written by: Rex M. Rogers
Years ago, I mean really early in our marriage, The Good Wife and I went out to eat at a restaurant serving Chinese. At the time I was still a “meat and potatoes” kid not too far from Smalltown, USA with its nearby farm. Beef, mashed potatoes, or hamburgers and fries, or Midwest “normal food.”
I didn’t grow up eating Chinese, so oriental fare wasn’t on my list of culinary delights. Consequently, I wasn’t sure what I was doing in a foreign restaurant. Parochial, I know, but that was me.
This was also about the time other professionals began to invite me to various places for lunch or dinner as part of my work. Invariably I’d end up in some restaurant serving food I thought was suspicious at best. What could I order and eat if I didn’t like anything in the restaurant?
Then The Good Wife rescued me. When we went out to eat that time, someplace she wanted to go that made me uncomfortable—but of course I went to please her—she said, “You should identify one type of meal you like in each kind of restaurant. Then, if you get invited to that kind of restaurant you’ll always know there’s one thing you can order that you like and you’ll enjoy yourself.”
Man, why didn’t I think of that? But I didn’t. Which goes to show you why the Lord said, “It is not good for the man to be alone. I will make a helper suitable for him.”
Since that day long ago I have learned to like many different kinds of food. I even like Chinese. Though I am still not an adventurous eater, much less a “foody.”
But whatever, no matter where I go I know by now that there’s at least one type of meal in that restaurant that I can order, eat, and like.
This may not seem like much. But it protected me from something else I’ve seen: being inflexible and possibly rude in terms of food and eating.
I’ve been in groups where most people suggested going to a certain kind of restaurant, only to have one person announce they won’t go there—because they “don’t like” that restaurant or “won’t go in” that restaurant. To which I am tempted to say, “So what? What about all the others who want to go there?”
This is not a big deal and adults can generally handle the situation. But I’m still amazed sometimes when I hear people weigh-in with their exclusive preference, seemingly utterly oblivious of everyone else. Oh well, that’s their problem.
The Good Wife taught me how to avoid at least one potential and unnecessary problem in my life, for which I salute her. My manners and etiquette are the better for her advice.
Want to go out for Chinese?
© Rex M. Rogers – All Rights Reserved, 2011
*This blog may be reproduced in whole or in part with a full attribution statement. Contact Rex or read more commentary on current issues and events at www.rexmrogers.com or follow him at www.twitter.com/RexMRogers.
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- Written by: Rex M. Rogers
The day begins with The Good Wife taking me to the GRR airport for what I thought would be two quick flights to Philadelphia by way of Cincinnati. This included a two-hour layover in Cinti, enough time to get a paper from the Delta Sky Club, eat lunch, and finish a new “Good News From the Middle East” column for SAT-7 USA. Alas, none of this was to be.
--When I approach the Delta counter at my home airport, which I’ve done about a million times, I notice there’s no sign or line for Sky Club Gold members, so I get in the busier primary line. And wait.
--Agent says, “Any Silver Elite, Gold Sky Club Members? Go around the other side of the luggage security check-in for new lines. No waiting.” So I do. I hadn’t seen this new desk, hidden as it was behind the behemoth luggage scanner.
--I get in the front of this new line, but still, I wait. Then I notice there are new check-in kiosks, so I get out of line to go to the kiosks, thus losing my place to another person, and of course the computer doesn’t allow me to check-in.
--I get back in the line and wait again and finally get to an agent, who I ask, “Is there something odd about my ticket, because this is the third trip in a row for which the Delta kiosks won’t let me sign in.” “No, looks OK to me,” she says, which doesn’t comfort me much, but I get my bag checked.
--TSA check-in is slow as usual, but it and my Delta flight to Cinti are uneventful. On the flight, drink but no snacks, another “cut back” no doubt saving Delta $millions per year. Actually, it’s what economists call a “petty economy.” On my cheap AirTran flight to Baltimore earlier this week I at least got cookies.
--I land in Cincinnati—really, it’s Northern Kentucky—and read an Orbitz alert email announcing my Delta connection to Philly has been cancelled.
--So I go immediately to the Delta Sky Club and discover Delta has rebooked me on a US Air flight, which leaves in 35 minutes in a different terminal from the one I’m in. I think, “No way I can get there” and say so. Agent says, “Oh, just take the tram. You can make it. No problem.” Yeah right, that and a dollar will get you a cup of coffee. But who knows, maybe?
--I find the tram and ride it two terminals over, then have to walk a long, long way, only to discover I must go outside the secured area into a public entrance and back in again, meaning I must go through another checkpoint the agent hadn’t told me about.
--At the TSA checkpoint the new, “faster” scanners require me to empty my pockets of everything: Excedrin—which I popped in my mouth because by now I have a headache—papers, pen, wallet, everything, plus belt and shoes off, laptop out and in a tray, phone in bag, and watch off and in bag.
--Here’s where it gets good: after placing my hands over my head and enduring the scanner for “just 7 seconds” taking an X-ray nudey picture, I wait and wait and wait, all the while listening to an agent call for people to board my jet to Philly—now. Why am I standing here so long? Finally, a male agent says, “Do you have a watch on?” and pushes back my sleeve. No, I don’t; it’s in my bag in the bin setting over there waiting for me. Apparently the scanner agent confused tan lines on my wrist for a watch. Now I feel especially safe.
--So now I think I’m a goner, but I have no choice, so I put on my shoes, don’t bother to put on my belt or re-bag my laptop, grab my assorted stuff, and run/jog to Gate 7, the last gate, of course, at the very end of a concourse a couple hundred yards long.
--When I arrive at Gate 7 panting and perspiring and thinking wonderful things about Delta, I hear what I knew I would hear: “I’m sorry; the plane has pushed back from the gate.”
--I know it’s not this agent’s fault, so I don’t get angry, but I do tell her that Delta put me on this flight, that it’s not my fault I’m late, and that they knew I was coming on a short connection and should have waited. This results only in the agent saying, “I can’t bring the plane back.”
--Now I have to rebook again. To get Delta to do this and to ask them why they booked me on a flight I couldn’t possibly make, I’d have to retread two concourses and tram back to the original terminal. No way. So I rebook with the US Air agent, who puts me on a US Air flight in one hour to Charlotte.
--US Air flight to Charlotte is OK if not where I want to go. No snacks. When I arrive I discover the entire airport is under internal construction, a major mess, no monitors. So I walk the length of a concourse just to find out where I should be going, which thankfully was a gate nearby.
--I grab a coffee and sit down to wait for a half hour, than hear the agent say, “Our flight to Philly has mechanical problems. We’ll give you an update shortly.” A few minutes later: “We’re sorry, this plane has been taken out of service, so you will need to go from D1 to B2 to catch your flight there.” B2 is a long way away.
--At B2 I board and we have an uneventful US Air flight to Philly, though no snacks, arriving 45 minutes later than when I thought I would land at day’s beginning.
--Now more fun: I suspected all along that my bag wouldn’t make it. Two airlines, changed flights, short connections, it’s inevitable. Sure enough, got to Philly and no bag. US Air doesn’t know if my bag’s in Cincinnati or Charlotte and doesn’t know if Delta or US Air has it. But they’re going to deliver it, right?
--After this I go out to await the rental car shuttle bus and I stand beside the appropriate sign and pick-up point at Station 2. The Thrifty bus shows up, guy looks right at me, and drives on by with an empty bus. I look at the nearby Philly policeman and say, “What does that guy think we’re here for?” Policeman only smiles.
--So I wait another 10 minutes and here comes the Thrifty bus. This time, to get him to stop, I have to go out in three lanes of traffic and flag him down. When I get on I ask him why he doesn’t stop at the established pick-up point and he says, “Are you sure it was me?" Yes I am because he was going to do it a second time.
--I get to the Thrifty rental car lot, supposed to find the car in the #30 parking place. Signs up for all ranges of numbers except a range including 30. Why? Have no idea. So I have to go back and ask for directions to #30, which I finally find, only to discover my rental car is a Canary Yellow Chevy Aveo. Works fine, but I look like a teenage girl driving it.
So, will my bag arrive tonight? I doubt it. Tomorrow? I hope so, because I depart the next morning for home, which if it’s another travel day like today may see me getting home who knows when?
This stuff happens everyday, but generally not to the same person. I know, because it usually doesn’t happen to me. Today was my turn.
© Rex M. Rogers – All Rights Reserved, 2011
*This blog may be reproduced in whole or in part with a full attribution statement. Contact Rex or read more commentary on current issues and events at www.rexmrogers.com or follow him at www.twitter.com/RexMRogers.
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- Written by: Rex M. Rogers
Good public discourse, open dialogue and discussion in the marketplace of ideas, is a staple of democracy. Without it there is no chance for government of, by, and for the people.
For good public discourse to take place certain requisites or attributes must be put in place within the body politic.
--People must embrace, then instill in culture and government, basic human rights: freedom of worship, freedom of speech, even expression, right to life, law, and order based on a public moral consensus.
--People who believe in objective truth.
--Freedom of expression must be recognized, protected, and preserved in law.
--People must respect others, which is to say, they must listen, which is to say, a certain discourse etiquette must be established.
--Absence of decorum in public discourse is a seed of the destruction of the marketplace of ideas.
--Discourse depends upon not necessarily an educated public, in the sense of formal schooling though this is good, but upon an informed public.
--For discourse to result in general wellbeing, that is, for democracy to work and for it to last, people must cultivate moral virtue, that is, a capacity to recognize good and to choose it—this only comes in acknowledging the place and purpose of religion.
--For discourse to function freely and productively to good ends, people must understand that disagreement can serve the good if it is based upon critiques of ideas and not upon criticism of ones holding the ideas.
--The degree to which disagreements degenerate to people upon people attacks is the degree to which disagreements no longer serve the public good.
Discourse that is little more than shouting matches, i.e. an absence of decorum, is what most radio and television talk shows have become. It is what much of electioneering or political campaigning has become.
Calling leaders in the political opposition derisive names or using cartoons and other materials to demean members of the political opposition in the name of humor does not credibly advance ones ideas. It’s actually a show of weakness. If you can’t win a point in discussion via moral suasion than you attack the other speaker or posture loudly to out shout the other. Weakness.
It seems today that if you disagree with someone you are ipso facto believed to be attacking the person. So it goes in our politically correct culture. Yet meanwhile and ironically, verbal attacks upon people with whom you disagree have become the order of the day. The American body politic desperately needs to rediscover the values and rules of engagement for discourse modeled by the Founding Fathers.
© Rex M. Rogers – All Rights Reserved, 2011
*This blog may be reproduced in whole or in part with a full attribution statement. Contact Rex or read more commentary on current issues and events at www.rexmrogers.com or follow him at www.twitter.com/RexMRogers.
Tiger Woods Makeover
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- Written by: Rex M. Rogers
It’s become fashionable for sports pundits to call for the public to forgive Tiger Woods. Or to say it’s time to “quit piling on” Tiger Woods. Or to “give Woods a break.”
Sports writers and announcers do this in part because they may be genuinely compassionate. Maybe some want to rehabilitate Woods in the public’s eye because they really don’t think what he did was all that bad anyway and, besides, it’s a free country. Some just want Woods back up to par, pun intended, because they regard him as the greatest talent ever to swing a golf club (who doesn’t?) and don’t much care what else he’s done if they get to see him perform at the highest level of his capability. Some want him back at the top because professional golf makes more money with Woods in contention.
It’s true, Woods didn’t kill anyone a la O.J. Simpson and didn’t rape anyone a la Mike Tyson. As far as we can tell, he didn’t do anything illegal. Immoral? Yes. Arrogant maybe? Probably. Chauvinistic? Definitely. Dumb and dumber? Absolutely. But his errors were ones carrying ripple effects for him and his family, not really for the rest of us. So why is so much of the public yet unwilling to let the man back inside the ropes, so to speak?
I don’t think it has anything to do with an unwillingness to forgive. Nor do I think the public is holding back on Woods because people like piling on or rooting for him to fail. Actually, the American public has historically been quick to restore fallen heroes: think Magic Johnson—even Mike Tyson has experienced something of a re-acceptance. But Woods: I believe fans are watching Woods like they’ve watched Pete Rose, with much the same suspicions.
Pete Rose bet on his own baseball games while managing the Cincinnati Reds. As a result he was forever banished from admission to the major league baseball Hall of Fame in Cooperstown. Some fans want him restored to consideration. Some don’t. The biggest argument against restoring him is Rose himself. First he denied he bet on the games he managed. Then he admitted to betting only on other games. Then finally when it became clear to him things weren’t going to change, he wrote a book admitting he bet on his own games and feebly apologizing. Along with this, since the day he was publicly disgraced he’s been a one-man campaign about how he deserves to be admitted, all the while presenting a less than believable and certainly less than remorseful persona.
That’s Woods, and that’s Woods’s biggest problem—his own persona. And by the way, I don’t think the public’s response to Woods has anything whatsoever to do with racism as some sports writers claim.
Woods is arrogant, standoffish, and surly on his best days. Sure, he can smile when he wants to and he can make a joke with reporters. But this is rare. Last week at The Master’s, he banged his golf clubs on the ground in open disgust, he cursed continually within range of cameras or microphones, and on one occasion the camera zoomed to his face just after a poor shot, catching him quite clearly mouthing a vulgarity. Worse, after a finish on Sunday not to his liking he was abrupt and quickly skipped out on the media.
Phil Mickelson is not an angel, but on a golf course or otherwise in public he does none of this. None. In fact, he goes out of his way to interact with fans, treats sports writers with respect, honestly assesses his game (Woods by his account is always “playing well”), and in general is a likable person who knows whereof his bread is buttered. Fans like him not just because he seems to have the picture perfect family, but because he openly cares for his family, likes people, and shows himself to be friendly.
Woods is the non-Mickelson. Where Mickelson plays with a swashbuckling style that probably looses a few tournaments, Woods is always the technician, greatly skilled but robotic. Where Mickelson is a happy person in the face of life’s challenges, Woods is barely controlled and barely concealed anger—it’s like it’s just under the surface. Mickelson wants to win for the joy of it, for his family, for the fans. Woods wants to win to claim he’s the best.
In the language of the King James Version, “A man that hath friends must show himself friendly.” I don’t know what Woods is like in private, but he is not a friendly person, actually a largely unpleasant persona in public. Fans know this and hold back. Who wants to be friends with someone who doesn’t want you as a friend?
If Woods wants a better future, he’d do well to spend more time working on his attitude and his interpersonal relationships skills than his golf game.
© Rex M. Rogers – All Rights Reserved, 2011
*This blog may be reproduced in whole or in part with a full attribution statement. Contact Rex or read more commentary on current issues and events at www.rexmrogers.com or follow him at www.twitter.com/RexMRogers.
Love Wins
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- Written by: Rex M. Rogers
The words in the title of this piece seem jarring in close association. The reason is they really don’t fit together, other than that Terry Jones has sensationally forced them into the same articles, comments, and reactions worldwide.
Jones is the pastor of the approximately 30-member Dove World Outreach Center of Gainesville, Florida, who apparently burned a Quran in his effort to “put on trial” a holy book and a religion with which he disagrees. Last fall he threatened to burn a Quran on an “International Burn the Koran Day,” but apparently demurred when General David Patraeus and Secretary of Defense Robert Gates implored him not to do so because it might cost American lives. President Obama made similar public comments at the time.
But Jones finally put his plan in action, allegedly burned a Quran, and the result to date has been more than 20 killed in Afghanistan, including United Nations employees. Related protests continue in Pakistan.
So as a Christian what am I to think of this? Here are a few things to consider:
--It’s a free country. We enjoy an incredible gift of freedom of speech (which the US Supreme Court has expanded to freedom of expression) that most of us did nothing to earn. It is our political birthright. But what may be legal is not always moral or ethical.
--As a believer we enjoy the incredible gift of Christian liberty, something we did nothing to earn. It is our spiritual birthright. But 1 Corinthians 10:23 reminds us, “’Everything is permissible’—but not everything is beneficial. ‘Everything is permissible’—but not everything is constructive."
--Scripture tells believers to speak the truth in love. It does not endorse what today we call “hate speech,” acts of violence, or incendiary in-your-face actions against those with whom we may disagree. In fact, Scripture commands us to “turn the other cheek” and to “love your enemies,” whomever we may perceive them to be.
--Jones’s “ministry,” if not a cult, is certainly “cultish.” He emulates the dictatorial pastor of Westboro Baptist Church in Topeka, Kansas, who also has apparently burned a Quran. They do not lead as shepherds. They rule and demean and pontificate and sensationalize. They have their 15 minutes of fame. I question what rewards they will receive in heaven.
--Burning the Quran accomplishes nothing but inciting to anger those who revere it. Is this a way to express love, to build a relationship based upon trust or mutual respect? If someone knocked on your door and insulted Christ or burned a Bible would you feel inclined to initiate a friendship? Does Jones really believe he is battling for truth? Or is he applying his warped worldview in the name of Christianity, all the while enjoying his time in the media sun?
--Burning the Quran is more than burning a given book. It’s an act of political malice akin to burning any symbol vested with the ideals of a people. Not long ago, some US Congressmen submitted bills intended to make burning US flags illegal. To date these amendments to the US Constitution have not been ratified by a sufficient number of states. Flag desecration is a protected act of “symbolic speech” in the US—while in many other countries such acts against the national symbol are illegal. The point is, while according to rulings by the US Supreme Court desecrating an American flag is protected speech, as is burning a Quran, we still don’t have to like it, embrace it, consider it wise, or report it via news media. Interestingly, national media are beginning to figure that out, dropping most references to Jones and hopefully letting him fade away from lack of attention.
--Is Jones’s faith so small, so lacking in confidence, that he fears placing the teachings of the Bible alongside the teachings of the Quran and allowing people to make their own decisions about truth, love, forgiveness, and hope?
--I feel sorry for Jones and his followers, for they are clearly enveloped in a false understanding of Jesus’s ethic of love and the beauty of the Christian faith. While I condemn the killing of innocents in Afghanistan in reaction to Jones’s Quran burning, I feel badly for the families who lost loved ones as part of the ripple effect of Jones’s actions.
--Jones is no more representative of biblical Christianity or of most believers than are members of the Ku Klux Klan.
--Burning the Quran or any other holy book from any religion is not an act of Christian love or an overture toward spiritual reconciliation for those who embrace those religions. It is an act of fear and prejudice, self-righteousness and ignorance. No true follower of Christ can or should condone such acts.
© Rex M. Rogers – All Rights Reserved, 2011
*This blog may be reproduced in whole or in part with a full attribution statement. Contact Rex or read more commentary on current issues and events at www.rexmrogers.com or follow him at www.twitter.com/RexMRogers.